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Motherhood Untold: Perinatal Mental Health

This blog series, Motherhood Untold, tells the stories of real moms navigating motherhood's real challenges and struggles. This month we're telling Adrienne Griffen a story about postpartum depression and anxiety.

If you or someone you know is suffering from postpartum depression and/or anxiety, please know that Postpartum Support International (www.postpartum.net, 1-800-944-4773, text 503-894-9453) is here to help; you are not alone.

Having a new baby can be one of the happiest times in a family's life, but the reality is far more complicated for many mothers. Mental health conditions are the most common complication of pregnancy and childbirth, impacting 1 in 5 pregnant or postpartum patients—that’s over 800,000 families each year in the United States alone. These conditions, such as anxiety and depression, can transform a joyful time into one filled with sadness, loneliness, and guilt.

Adrienne Griffen, the founder of Postpartum Support Virginia, has experienced this firsthand. “After my son was born in 2001, I went through postpartum depression and anxiety. It started after a scary emergency C-section—my son might not have survived if we hadn’t been in the hospital. He needed to be held constantly and wouldn’t take a bottle, leaving me exhausted and overwhelmed while also caring for a toddler.”

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Adrienne Griffen's Story

Adrienne’s experience reflects the reality that perinatal mental health (PMH) conditions can occur any time during pregnancy or up to a year postpartum, affecting not only mothers but also up to 1 in 10 fathers and partners. These conditions are bio-psycho-social illnesses, meaning they stem from multiple factors, and they are not the parent’s fault. Adrienne recalls, “At my lowest point, I ran away from home. I told my husband he could have everything—the house, the children, the car—I just wanted to find a place to sleep for a month.”

Symptoms of PMH conditions often include depression (feeling sad, hopeless, or alone) and anxiety (feeling overwhelmed or fearful). Many mothers also experience intrusive thoughts, which can be alarming. However, as Adrienne emphasizes, “Having those thoughts does NOT mean you’re going to act on them.”

Some mothers express their feelings in ways that others may not immediately recognize as depression or anxiety. They might say:

  • “I’m exhausted but can’t sleep, even when my baby sleeps.”
  • “I feel like I’m drowning.”
  • “I’m overwhelmed with rage, often directed at my partner.”
  • “I feel like the worst mother in the world.”
  • “My family would be better off without me.”
  • “I feel guilty for having these feelings.”

The risk factors

The risk factors for PMH conditions are varied and include a personal or family history of mental health issues, sensitivity to hormonal changes, lack of social support, traumatic birth, and major life stressors such as financial difficulties or illness. “Individuals who are BIPOC, LGBTQ, military parents, or those with babies in the neonatal intensive care unit are at increased risk for experiencing mental health challenges during the childbearing years,” Adrienne explains.

Fortunately, these conditions are often temporary and treatable. Adrienne, after seeking help, found a combination of more sleep, talk therapy, and antidepressant medication to be effective. “Once I connected with doctors who understood what I was going through, I quickly started feeling better,” she says.

When it comes to self-care, Adrienne shares that “getting 5-6 hours of uninterrupted sleep is the single most important and least expensive thing new parents can do to start feeling better.”

But self-care is more than just sleep. Nutrition, light exercise, and time off every day, even just for 15 minutes, are key components to recovery.

FIT4MOM Love & Support

Social support is equally critical. “Friends and family can help by doing simple tasks like holding the baby so parents can nap, shower, or take a walk,” Adrienne suggests. And support groups—whether online, in-person, or through organizations like FIT4MOM—can be lifelines. “FIT4MOM played a key role in my recovery. I met wonderful friends, had something on the calendar to get me out of the house, and exercised outdoors, which gave me a sense of purpose.”

For some parents, professional help is needed, such as counseling to navigate the challenges of new parenthood or even medication to treat mental health conditions. Adrienne reminds us that “any decision about medication should always be made in consultation with health care providers.”

Adrienne offers practical advice for those who want to support new parents:

  • Ask how they’re doing. Focus on the parent’s well-being, not just the baby’s.
  • Normalize their experience. Let parents know they are not alone and that many struggle during this transition.
  • Offer help. Cook a meal, fold laundry, or care for the baby so parents can rest.
  • Connect them with support:

In times of crisis and moments when mental health needs urgent attention, it is crucial to have readily accessible resources. Whether you or someone you know is facing an emergency or navigating the complexities of mental health, a network of support is available. The following resources serve as lifelines, offering immediate assistance and guidance.

From local emergency rooms to national hotlines, these contacts are here to provide the necessary support. Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, and these resources are designed to offer hope, understanding, and assistance when it's needed most. In times of distress, don't hesitate to reach out and connect with the compassionate professionals dedicated to supporting individuals and families on their mental health journey.

  • In an Emergency

    • Go to your local emergency room.

    • Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: Dial 988

    • National Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741 from anywhere in the USA, anytime, about any type of crisis.

    • National Suicide Prevention Hotline and Website: 1-800-273-8255 & suicidepreventionlifeline.org

National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) Helpline: NAMI offers a Helpline that provides information, resources, and support for individuals and families dealing with mental health conditions. Call 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) for assistance.

National Maternal Mental Health Hotline: Counselors provide information, support, brief interventions, and resources: 1-833-TLC-MAMA (1-833-852-6262) - Call or text, 24/7, English and Spanish

National Domestic Violence Hotline: The National Domestic Violence Hotline offers confidential support for individuals experiencing domestic violence. Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or chat online at www.thehotline.org for assistance.

Postpartum Support International (PSI): Postpartum Support International (PSI) is the world’s leading organization in providing hope and help to childbearing individuals affected by maternal mental health conditions, as well as their partners and families. Call 800-944-4773 or text 503-894-9453 www.postpartum.net

You are not alone. You are not to blame. With help, you will be well.

KEEP LEARNING

About Adrienne Griffen

Adrienne Griffen, MPP, is the founding Executive Director of the Maternal Mental Health Leadership Alliance (mmhla.org), a nonpartisan nonprofit organization dedicated to national advocacy for the mental health of childbearing women in the United States. MMHLA advocates for universal education, screening, referral, and treatment of postpartum depression and related maternal mental health challenges.

Adrienne is also the founder of Postpartum Support Virginia (postpartumva.org), which she started to fill a gap in services: when she experienced postpartum depression and anxiety in 2002, it took almost six months to find the help she needed. Under Adrienne’s leadership, PSVa grew into a statewide network of support groups and maternal mental health coalitions which have helped thousands of new mothers. For her efforts, Adrienne was selected as the Peer Specialist of the Year by the National Council for Behavioral Health (January 2016) and a Woman of Vision by Arlington County’s Commission on the Status of Women (June 2018).

Adrienne serves on the Board of Directors of the Marce Society of North America and the Mental Health Liaison Group, as well as on the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists Committee on Practice Bulletins – Obstetrics.

Adrienne graduated from the US Naval Academy and has a Master’s in Public Policy from Harvard’s Kennedy School of Government. Her early career included military and federal government service at the White House, Pentagon, and IRS. Adrienne lives in Arlington VA with her husband and three children young adult children.